


You and Mr. Barnes - Alternate Ending

by takethethirdoption



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Ending, You and Mr Barnes, winter soldier - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-04-25 23:34:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4981090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takethethirdoption/pseuds/takethethirdoption
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You tried your best to protect Bucky and it cost you your life.</p><p>A distinct cut from Chapters 14 and 15.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You and Mr. Barnes - Alternate Ending

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I totally forgot that I had this saved up on my laptop! This was what I wrote as an alternate ending just because. It was way back last year when I first started writing this story. 
> 
> I think I have the prototype of You and Mr. Barnes in general somewhere on here... just say so if you want to see it.

You were given a quiet funeral, attended by very few. No one simply knew you were dead. There was a small notice put in the obituaries, and the only people who stopped by were old HYDRA agents who sort of liked you. Cruelly, it was held during one of Bucky's preps. 

Surprisingly, Pierce got you a good-quality tombstone, with a thoughtful inscription to boot.

_Loving sister, daughter, doctor and friend. May she finally be at peace._

Grass was slowly growing over the still soft dirt mound when several helicarriers blew up over D.C.

 

Upon making sure his old friend was alive, Bucky popped his shoulder back into place and started to look for a place to get off the grid. Shedding his uniform, he - honestly, he really did feel bad for it - robbed a goodwill store and got himself a new pair of everything: shoes, shirt, jacket, pants, and a baseball cap to help hide his face. Food wasn't difficult to come by, but it often didn't taste very good. Thanks to the serum, the pain of his arm seemed to lessen with each passing hour, and hunger didn't often affect him. 

He needed answers to who he was. A passing newspaper told him that there was an exhibit on Captain America and his Howlin' Commandoes were. That sounded familiar to him, so there he went. Days upon days went by, memories soon trickling in little by little. Bucky Barnes... his name was Bucky Barnes.

Considering how much time he spent in D.C., it was only a matter of time until Steve Rogers found him. 

Steve couldn't bear to see his friend on the streets and soon pulled him into his apartment. Food was shoved into his system before being shown to a bed. Now he had a home.

Digging into his pocket, Bucky pulled out a small golden key. Home. He didn't know where this key led and he couldn't remember even receiving it. Even so, he kept it close on his person. Maybe it would mean something to him one day. All he could say to Steve, who caught him staring at it while reclined on a chair, was that it made him feel calm.

Steve didn't ask questions. He was kind like that. Surely the best friend that he swore himself to be.

Bucky couldn't help that something was missing from his more recent memories. There were pieces missing that his brain couldn't defog. 

“Describe what you think it should be,” Steve suggested, bringing Bucky a cup of coffee.  
“Um... soft?” Bucky offered. “I don't know, there's something there that's... not bad.”  
“In HYDRA?”  
“Yeah, I know, I can't believe it either.”  
“Well, the person had to be a doctor or a field agent. Those are the only people you interacted with?”  
“Yeah... thinking not a field agent. Had to be a doctor or something...”  
“Use all your senses. Try to remember.”

Bucky closed his eyes and tried to focus. It was like recalling the lyrics of a song you hadn't listened to in forever, but listened to so many times in the past that you couldn't quite forget it all the way.

“I think... it was a lady,” Bucky muttered, rubbing his temples.  
“That's a start! How many lady doctors could HYDRA have had?” Steve smiled. “And she's probably still alive considering how many cover-ups are being discovered even now!”

Alive? But he barely could remember who you were. And he had no idea how to trigger your memories either. Steve had a copy of his file handy, but that didn't help him remember you. None of the names in the file were female. Even remotely close to being so. 

One step back.

 

Natasha Romanoff dropped by one day, and after nearly breaking his arm, Steve rushed in to stop the fight. No, Bucky was his friend again. Please don't hurt him. He's trying to remember someone.

“Oh, remember whom?”  
“Err... I'm not sure. Steve and I think it's a lady doctor I had.”  
“What makes you think lady doctor?”  
“I don't know... I just remember feeling at ease outside of the field. So we figured doctor, and woman.”  
“Men can make you feel at ease too. Clint does that, Banner does...” Natasha replied.  
“It's just a gut feeling, Nat,” Bucky sighed. “I don't remember her... but it's in there.”  
“Well, try taking a shower. That ought to make you feel better. Or better yet, here.” Natasha dug into her purse and pulled out a small vial of perfume. She then proceeded to spray some in Bucky's face. “At least you don't smell bad now. Steve doesn't make you bathe?”

Bucky looked down at Natasha's smirking face, but another face appeared for a split second. 

“The lady!” he gasped.  
“What?”  
Bucky grabbed the vial and sprayed it on his wrist, bringing the scent up to his nostrils. “I saw her when I smelled it... it's triggering something...”

Natasha leaned back as Bucky paced through Steve's apartment. A small pang of pity rose up in her. He really did look distraught trying to find this lady doctor of his. Surely she could help him.

“What do you remember about her?” she asked. “Name?”  
“No, but she was absolutely beautiful,” Bucky said, not aware he was speaking out loud. “And kind and bright...”

Natasha held in a sigh. She uploaded HYDRA's encrypted files onto the internet. Maybe she could do some digging.

When the Russian spy left, Bucky sat down and began writing. He wrote everything he remembered about you. Looks, what you said, what you dressed like, how you acted. He had a decent collection of you going by the time Natasha showed up the next day with your dossier.

She was dismayed to find out that you were dead not long before the final mission to take down HYDRA. There was no easy way to break this to Bucky... so she got Steve to help.

Steve was no stranger to having loved ones either dead or not recollecting him, so he put a hand on Bucky's shoulder. 

“I remember her name,” Bucky said proudly. He was even smiling. “And she can't be that hard to find. She has to live here, in the city. And this key...” Bucky pulled the small key out of his pocket. He always kept it close by. “This key must be to her home! Imagine walking in on her by surprise. Maybe she's been looking for me too.”  
That broke his heart, but he kept a solemn face. He would learn soon enough. “Buck, I have to pay my respects to someone. Want to come? It won't be long.”  
“Yeah, sure.”

Bucky thought that Steve needed him and he was happy to oblige. They bought a bouquet of flowers and headed down to the graveyard. After some direction, Steve walked along the rows and rows of tombstones with Bucky. His friend was thinking of other things, like how to best surprise you. 

“It should be around here somewhere,” Steve sighed, scanning the tombstones for your name. You died young. The dirt wasn't fresh anymore, but the granite should still be clean.  
Bucky had just as good eyes as Steve. Meaning he could read a tombstone a good distance away from him.

“What...”

Steve glanced to the side to see Bucky jogging over to a tombstone, stopping fast in front of it.

He read your name aloud. “She's... she's... dead.”  
Bucky said it so low that Steve could barely hear him.  
“Nat did some digging and found out. She didn't know how to tell you. Buck, I'm sorry.”

Steve went to put a hand on Bucky's shoulder, only to watch him fall to his knees in front of your grave.

“The death date is the day... we met on the bridge,” Bucky breathed. “That means something...”  
“Do you remember something from that day? Did they erase your memory?” Steve asked, squatting next to him.  
“Um... they did... she... I think she tried to stop it. Pierce didn't like that, so he hit her. Got Brock Rumlow to finish it. I had to listen.” It all came back to him so fast. Your look of pain. Struggling to do what was right. Succeeding but failing all the same.  
“Buck, I'm so sorry,” Steve repeated, now putting that hand on his friend's shoulder. 

Tears started to fall freely from Bucky's eyes. He tried to beat them back. That made it worse.

“I didn't protect her! I could have! I should have told her to let them erase my mind! I would've been fine! But no. She was worried about me... she was so selfless and she got killed for it!” He was sobbing, gripping onto his friend as he hugged him tight. “I loved her, Steve! I loved her and she's dead!”  
Steve didn't say anything. What could he say? So he kept on hugging his friend as sobs tore from his throat. He was going to start crying, but he swallowed the lump in his throat and comforted Bucky.

 

“She was too good for this world,” Bucky coughed when he couldn't bring himself to cry anymore. He delicately played with the petals of the flower bouquet. “Maybe it's best she didn't see what happened to me. The government would have locked her up and thrown away the key... then we wouldn't see each other again...”  
“I don't think that's quite true. But I have a feeling she loved you too.”  
“You think?”  
“Of course. No one stands up to HYDRA without loving the person they did it for.” Steve gave Bucky a brave smile. 

Bucky nodded and pulled the key out of his pocket. It technically didn't mean anything to him anymore. The hope that you were alive... it didn't matter where you once lived. He thought of burying it next to you. Or throwing it into the ocean. Instead he put it back in his pocket. Maybe he would find a chain and make a necklace out of it. 

He wasn't going to forget you. Even dead, you were the light of his life. The angel in a sea of demons. You had tried to save him. You had gotten yourself killed for it. Bucky would never let anyone die for what was right from then on. He would fight HYDRA. He would fight whatever evil called itself. He would find the man that dealt you the killing blow and avenge you. Steve was part of a team called The Avengers, right? Well, he would join them and do just that. He was going to be better. He would be better in your honor until death finally claimed him as well, and then he would see you again. 

The last love of his life.


End file.
